Nanaimo playwright Joëlle Rabu is bringing dementia to the spotlight with a show that hits the stage at the Malaspina theater later this month. Set in a dementia care facility, I Don’t Belong Here: Stories and Songs at the Edge of Forgetting is portrayed through the eyes of 22 different characters.
“We offer the stories of the residents…in the care facility…the perspective from their family members that come to visit – very different perspective. And we also look at the perspective of the care aids, which is giving them a voice because they are really the keeper of the memories in a way,” said Rabu.
Rabu, who co-wrote the play with Kelly Wyatt, says the pair were thoughtful about telling a story involving potentially sensitive subject matter like dementia, and she feels it’s important to make space to share stories of memory loss.
“I’m old enough to know that there was a time we wouldn’t even talk about cancer, you know? And as soon as we started to talk about it and there were rallies and there were walks for cancer…as soon as people started to talk about it, it opened up a conversation for humans that were suffering from it, that were dealing with it, and the ones that were on the other side,” she said.
Rabu says many elements in the play are drawn from experiences with close connections in her life, including her father.
“ I remember when my father was starting to say weird things, I didn’t wanna believe that it was happening, and I made excuses, and then I felt guilty that I couldn’t look after him because of course I could look after my father. But in this kind of mental health crisis, no, I couldn’t, I did not have the tools,” she said. “It’s important to understand the point of view from every angle in order to understand the disease and the journey that goes with it.”
Nanaimo playwright Joelle Rabu spoke with People First Radio about I Don’t Belong Here, Stories and Songs at The Edge of Forgetting
Rabu says her experience with friends and loved ones who have experienced forms of dementia has taught her to react to news of a diagnosis by saying “ I see. How can I help and how can I help?”
“How can I help, I think, is, a reaction that allows people to then tell you what they need. And, instead of us saying, oh, I’m so sorry, and the shoulda, coulda, wouldas.”
Rabu says she hopes Nanaimo comes out to see the show.
“There’s lots of joy and happiness. There’s a little bit of absurdity in there, there has to be because there are absurd moments in life,” she said.
“Everybody that comes to see this play, every single person so far has said, ‘I know someone. And it could be just a friend of a friend, or it could be a loved one, or we’ve even had people at the audience talk back, say, ‘I have Alzheimer’s,’…it’s opened up a lot of conversation. So that’s the only thing I would say is let’s talk, it’s the most important thing.”
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